All New Aston Martin Vantage unveiled

Ah, it's just what you want from an Aston. Pretty and fast, with a V8 rumble!

Oh, we just hate it when Astons look this good. Not because we’re sour and we cannot afford one, but because we’re sour and cannot afford one. Yes, the new Aston Martin Vantage (like we thought it would following the spectacular DB11 Volante) really looks awesome (doesn’t it?) and features everything we love about V8 Astons. Like a V8. And an Aston badge. And an air of pomposity. Yes, that’s a word meaning that you think you’re better than us now that you have the new awesome Vantage…

Jokes bro! You probably are better than us, and you probably started from the bottom now you’re here, have a model gf (or bf), and contribute very handsomely to charity, you sick son of a show-off gun! 

Why you gotta be so perfect?

Still, we love you, albeit outrageously jealous of you, and to be fair, we love that you have an Aston. You legend! You see, pomposity, we concede, is not quite the flaw it once was in Astons of old and much of that has to do with this celebration of colour, which we’ve dubbed Boomslang green. Passop! It brings Aston down to earth a bit and puts it into a “new money” sort of league. 

We like “new money” more than “old money” because “new money” is fun, and it makes for Astons that turn your head more than old chrome grills and stiff Bond upper lips. It truly is a great looking thing and although we are huge fans of the Porsche 911, it would be very difficult to choose a Porsche over this Aston because it really looks that good. 

Boasting a 4.0 litre V8, it delivers an impressive 375kW, which is probably the equivalent of something else spectacular. What? We have no idea. But, if you want to know what these numbers mean in the real world, know this, it is basically twice as fast as a Golf GTi to 100km/h and hits that target in 3.6 seconds. Yes, that there is the money shot. It is pretty. It is fast. And it comes with a V8 rumble. 

Ma’gents. Ma’laides. It’s quite perfect in other words - in Boomslang green nogal! Oh, and how much, you ask? Ppfffft. Please don’t ruin our day… Let’s just say it will cost 6-7 more times more than your GTi too.