"It's a mash-up of all those iconic BMWs that you love so much. Like the i8. And the M1. And the Lamborghini Gallardo."
Prep yourself before you wreck yourself gents: The Vision M Next might very well become your next top-of-the-top M BMW, which means that every cuzzie from Bedfordview to Chatsworth just licked their lips. Yummy right? Indeed.
It's a mash-up of all those iconic BMWs that you love so much. Like the i8. And the M1. And the Lamborghini Gallardo. Wait, that isn't right, is it? Shhh, we won't tell them if you won't.
But seriously, if you are into M BMWs, which you probably are because South Africans love M BMWs more than they love brandy, you're gonna love this: Another vicious hybrid by our favourite Bavarian, which, although still unconfirmed, seems well on this coming decade.
With four petrol-burning cylinders somewhere inside of it, mixed with electric motors out front and back, it's set to arrive with a lekker klap-to-the-face as well.
To put it into context, it's electric motors alone will be more powerful than the entire BMW i8, which should make you smirk. Indeed, 0-100km/h in 3 seconds flat is smirk-worthy and a top speed of 300km/h (governed, no doubt) is more than enough to turn that into a smile.
But, it's the touches of BMW's future that we find most intriguing that, when spoken about, will make you the most interesting person at your next braai. Like gyroscopic cup holders, which isn't something meant for your prostate.
No, gyroscopic cup holders are cup holders that keep your coke up-right and fizzy, even when racing around your aunty's suburb. Isn't that kind? Sure is.
But, most impressively, it's the augmented reality of the driving experience that we love most: It projects cornering lines and braking points onto the road in front of you so that you can get the most out of your lefts and rights. Sure, that might sound like cheating and you'd be right.
Then again, our grand fathers probably called seat belts cheating so we'll just leave it at that.
Then, notice the orange BMW badges inside the taillights and imagine the man who thought of the idea. He probably went home that night and patted himself on the back, completely oblivious to the eyebrow raising it was going to cause.
Like those happening right now. What say you? Perhaps a touch too far? Perhaps.